Family Matters

Dear Dad

I just wanted to apologize that I had to be your caretaker when you were sick.  I wish we could have afforded the money to have someone take care of you.  At twenty-one years old, it’s a tall order to be a sole caretaker, and I tried my best to hold everything together, as much as I could for you.   When you’re twenty-one, the thought never crosses your mind about having to take care of your parents at that age.
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I’m sorry for the times I got frustrated with you.  I’m sorry for the times we were irritable with each other.  I’m sorry for the times I was lazy and didn’t want to go to the store for you.  I’m sorry for not keeping the house tidy for you – I should have taken that upon myself.  I’m sorry for not showing more care – I know you knew I did, but I could have done more.  I’m sorry for being rude at times, when I should have shown kindness.

Thank you for still loving me through it all. I know that you understood the place I was in – and that sometimes it was the only way I could deal with certain situations.

Thank you for choosing to go with hospice in your last month of life.  For giving me the opportunity to be your daughter again, because somewhere in that last year, we lost that relationship and all I wanted was to be able to have it back again.  I will always always love you for that.  I know you wanted to go home, thank you for being selfless; letting others help to care for you and ultimately letting me be your daughter again.